Health Talk


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02 May 2021 20:20:04
There is nothing to fear, but fear itself.

Or so we were told.

Like Santa Clause, The Easter Bunny, and The Tooth Fairy, that was a lie.

Fear is an intense emotional state. We cannot escape it’s clutches. Fear grips us to our very souls. We have all been victim to it’s paralyzingly effects.

Are you afraid right now?

You should be.

The system is on the verge of collapse. The social safety net is teetering. You don’t know this. Because they don’t tell you this.

But you do know it.

Or at least you suspect it.

You can see it for yourself. When you walk past the empty shops downtown. The streets empty. Sidewalks bare. The city is bankrupt. And so are the people.

A population prone to paranoid anti-social behaviour, now even more so.

There are those who chose to breathe in the exhaust of oncoming traffic over the exhaust of one’s very own brother on the sidewalk.

The fear is real.

As I write this, I can hear the voices of the protesters on the street. Just one short block away. They have been gathering every weekend for a month. And the rallies are getting larger.

No longer satisfied to limiting themselves to gatherings in village square. They now march the streets. Carrying their message to you. Instead of waiting for you to come to them.

Our rights have been stripped. Our livelihoods at stake. The deck has been stacked. As always, the house wins again.

Be afraid. Be very afraid.

Seek help.

There will ALWAYS be someone willing to listen.

The will ALWAYS be someone willing to help.

You CAN overcome this.

You are NOT alone.

This is NOT your fault

It’s theirs.

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02 May 2021 07:55:51
The government failed us.

They are obligated under oath to protect us. This they did not do. They didn’t.

A horrible mismanagement of the C.V. outbreak has turned our country into a hot spot. Multiple strains are beginning to run rampant. The lockdowns seemingly having no effect. The vax rollout a nightmare.

The state of affairs caused by the C.V. is a sorry state indeed.

Small businesses bankrupt. While the Walmart’s of the world keep getting richer. Oil at record highs. Oil still needs their fair share. Whether you think it’s fair or not.

They had one job. One job.


They FAILED in their oath to protect us
They FAILED in their duties as representatives of the people
They FAILED in their responsibilities to provide adequate health benefits
They FAILED in their obligation to obtain, and distribute, the vax in an efficient manner
And they FAILED in their jobs as government officials capable of handling this crisis properly.

Crying on tv breaks no hearts in the strained minds of citizens. Stretched to their limits. The result of government incompetence. Twiddledee and Twiddledum don’t have clue.

C.V. kills. So does depression. So does alcoholism. So does suicide.

After this C.V. is over, there will be no returning to a normal life. Not for many.

The loneliness and social anxiety caused by this C.V. has become deeply rooted. Systemic. It is not going to heal overnight. It’s not.

The fear is real.

For those who fear they cannot go on any longer, seek help.

There will ALWAYS be someone willing to listen.
There will ALWAYS be someone willing to help.

You are not alone.

This is not your fault.

It’s theirs.

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02 May 2021 07:23:04
The dangers of the opioid crisis cannot be understated.

This crisis cannot be ignored any
longer. It has been going on for years. There is no cure for it. And there never will be. It keeps getting worse. The hot zones are multiplying.

The dangers are real.

The pill pushers in parliament have turned their very own citizens into addicts.

Once again, we were lied to. Dangers downplayed. Only after the ill effects were apparent to all was an effort made to address the issue. By then it was too late.

A planned process of procrastination.

At the expense of the citizens they are bound by oath to protect.

It’s the same old song and dance.
Big tobacco played out all over again.

Our physical health and mental well being secondary consideration, if considered at all, in acquiescence to the all mighty dollar.

Your life. That which you hold most precious to yourself. All that you are. Your very own soul. Assigned a dollar value. And not a very large one at that.

Just another number on the spreadsheet.
A statistic.

Billions earned by big pharma. And the drugs keep coming. Stronger and cheaper. They are easy to find. You probably know someone using them already.

A corrupt system of doctors, insurance companies, big pharma, and government officials have made this possible. Those you trusted the most led the charge.

The rich continue to enslave the working class hero through any means available. They hold us in disdain. Their halo raises them above all others. And brings them closer to the cross.

Fentanyl kills. If you are killed, you lose a very important part of your life.

And should you live. Is that a life you really want to live?

There are options.

The government pays for them.
As they should.

Seek help if you need it.

There is ALWAYS someone willing to talk to you. There is ALWAYS someone willing to help.

You DON’T need to do this alone.

It’s NOT your fault.

It’s theirs.

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05 Mar 2021 22:41:14
Just wanted to say a big thanks for this site. I've been ill over the last 5 months and still don't know what's wrong. I've been needing blood transfusions every 3 weeks and are due to have surgery in the next 4 weeks to find out why. I'm only 39 and have 5 kids and to be honest, I'm a little scared. This site has been a god send. I've been on here for the last 5 -6 years and I've always loved it, however I've needed it more so over the last 5 months. Its brought normality and a distraction. Thanks to everyone that's runs it. Keep it up.

{Ed033's Note - Not saying this is your problem, but all of us in the last year have been subjected to a massive increase in Electromagnetic Radiation, and not just from smart meters and or 4G/5G Towers/Emitters. Medical Doctors aren't testing for it and don't seem to know about it. It's affecting all our blood as seen in the video below (and some people are more sensitive to their blood being affected than others). The way around this is to buy an electromagnetic radiation tester, then look youtube for how other people have lowered the electromagnetic radiation in a room by making alterations to the room.

Also, if people want to wake up, then visit our conspiracy site.}

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11 Jun 2020 12:40:19
I've been learning a bit about The Chimp Paradox by Steve Peters the last couple of days, really interesting stuff.
Basically it's a very simple and easy to understand way of seeing how our minds work and why we struggle sometimes plus how to deal with things better and be happier.
Steve Peters apparently worked with Liverpool in the 2013 14 season and with Chris Hoy and Victoria Pemberton in the 2012 Olympic games and from everything I've read about plus seen on YouTube about him seems to be a really nice bloke who has a really good understanding of the mind and has developed a very simple way to share his knowledge with other people.
I thought I'd share what I'd found it with anyone else who might be interested in taking a look, I'm so impressed I'm actually going to invest in the audiobook once I get back to work :-)

{Ed001's Note - I would call it nonsense personally and it certainly didn't help when Liverpool needed it.....}

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11 Jun 2020 13:16:43
Fair comment Ed001 mate I actually did think about how that season ended for Liverpool and think?
But having seen several YouTube videos plus read some very good user reviews on the method from people who had struggled for years before hand I though it was definitely worth sharing.
I was impressed enough to want to buy a copy but then again I bought real 4 unicorns and a genuine dragons tail 3 weeks ago that still haven't arrived so maybe I'm not a good example of where to spend your money :-) but luckily for the less gullible there is plenty of free stuff online too!

{Ed001's Note - it's fine if it works, but it is not a genuine change, it is more hiding behind another prop imo. I read a lot about him when he was brought in at Liverpool, took the time to read the book and was not in the slightest impressed. It just seems like a crutch, rather than a genuine method for improving yourself.}

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11 Jun 2020 13:54:07
That's an extremely fair comment given you've actually read the book yourself mate.
I think it's a bit like giving up smoking or dieting where by what works for some doesn't work for others and because we are all individuals we all relate differently to different methods, we just have to find what works for best for us.
I'm going for the audiobook because I've recently realised I tend to retain verbal information better than written, if I'm mastermind champion 2021 then we will know it's worked for me at least :-)

{Ed001's Note - and there is another reminder we are all different and need different inputs etc - I retain written information more easily than verbal. I fully agree you have to go for what works for you, but that is very rarely going to come from self-help books in the long term. I prefer the way Bruce Lee would look to when he said 'Be water, my friend' and talked about no way as the way. Basically you look into all the methods and then cherry pick just the bits that work for you and put it all together as your own way of doing things.}

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11 Jun 2020 16:11:30
Mate I couldn't agree more with both you and Bruce; there is no absolute right or wrong way to go and with a mix and match approach at some point somewhere we all find our own way,
I read once " enjoy the company of those who seek the truth but be extremely cautious of anyone and everyone who claim to have found the one real truth ".

{Ed001's Note - that is a very good saying. It is a bit like studying history, there is no one true history as we all remember things slightly differently and our memories get altered over time as well. It is not just our memories that change, we do, so what works one day is not necessarily going to work the next one. You have to flow - like water - and adapt to circumstance.}

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11 Jun 2020 16:58:34
Absolutely mate, the clue is in the title His Story which is basically someone somewhere's version of events. All our memory's are a rough sketch of what really happend back in time with a huge dose of our own feelings positive or negative about the event added for good measure.
The most valuable lessons in history are our mistakes so we can save ourselves from repeating them, hopefully!

{Ed001's Note - or so we can make sure that we repeat the most fun ones over and over.....}

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11 Jun 2020 17:32:23
Absolutely right mate, life isn't about keeping everyone else happy for me it's about living life as you want and makes you happy as long as what you do doesn't take away anyone's else right to be happy too.
Be kind as often as possible and when your not able to be kind simply don't be unkind to anyone.

{Ed001's Note - me ma always used to say if you have nothing nice to say then don't say anything. I used to be quiet a lot back then!}

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11 Jun 2020 18:23:59
It's funny my Mum always said the same mate, she also told me don't say behind someone's back what you wouldn't be happy to say to thier face!

{Ed001's Note - I have always lived by that rule as well. It got me into a lot of trouble as I always seem to forget the second part of it.}

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07 Jun 2020 12:01:24
Apologies if it’s not for this page but I just didn’t know where else to put it.

I woke up this morning to see there were pockets of violence in the protests last night, how to people find this acceptable? I’m expecting my first child in September and I’m seriously questioning the world I’m bringing them into.

Firstly, black lives matter, just like other minority communities and no one deserves to be marginalised based on their skin colour or there sexuality but there is literally no room for violence. But I do see why they are turning to it, they feel like they are not being heard and they have likely become disillusioned with the people there to protect them.

So how do we fix it? Well first there needs to be some leadership from within government. Someone admitting that enough still hasn’t been done to level the playing field, someone to remove the hate on both sides and try and move our country and world forward. We also need to admit this won’t be a short term fix, there’s some hard graft that needs to be put in to right some wrongs.
Lastly, we need to remove the hate and bile people spout on social media, how is it right that someone can just abuse someone else on line with no consequence? Some may call it banter but you have no idea what someone else has going on and how what you say may effect them. I think what I am getting it is that we have created a world where we can communicate with people we have never met on the other side of the world and some of us use it to spread hate.
Unfortunately there will always be ignorant individuals in this world but maybe we all need to do more to call it out and just be kind.
It can make the biggest difference and costs nothing.

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08 Jun 2020 18:12:43
Hi mate, the ball is rolling like never before across the western world and the more peaceful the protests are the less Trogan Horse ammunition there is for those who don't want change at all but are ashamed or afraid to be openly seen as not wanting change.

As Bobby Marley said
"Until there are no longer first class and second class citizens of any nation
until the colour of a man's skin is of no more significance than the colour of his eyes "
until the basic human rights are equally garenteed to without regard to race "
we are confident in the victory of good over evil".

There can be no turning back now thankfully but true and lasting change will only come and come quickly if built on the solid foundations of peaceful consensus rather than with violence and confrontation.
When Nelson Mandela was finally released his message was simple clear and beautiful, forgiveness.

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08 Jun 2020 18:30:08
Sorry that should have been Bob Marley not Bobby Marley, not sure how I managed that.

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09 Jun 2020 11:39:47
As Bob also said,

This morning I woke up in a curfew
O God, I was a prisoner, too - yeah!
Could not recognize the faces standing over me
They were all dressed in uniforms of brutality. Eh!

How many rivers do we have to cross
Before we can talk to the boss? Eh!
All that we got, it seems we have lost
We must have really paid the cost
Burnin' and a-lootin' tonight

(Say we going to burn and loot)
Burnin' and a-lootin' tonight
(One more thing)
Burnin' all pollution tonight
(Oh, yeah, yeah)
Burnin' all illusion tonight

Same story for centuries, and people are more appalled by a statue of a racist being dumped in the sea.

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09 Jun 2020 13:49:54
Exactly gunner, there are idiots in all walks of life and the violence is damaging their message.

Then you have people creating there own narrative on twitter and facebook. Think I should really deactivate the latter.

The simple message should be of respect and kindness and build from there. The world has been an ugly place at times and it will take time and effort from all sides to right.

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09 Jun 2020 18:38:45
Hi Danny
" emancipate yourself from mental slavery none but ourselves can free our minds
Have no fear for automatic energy cause none of them can stop the time.
How long shall they kill our brothers and sisters while we stand aside and look
Some say it's just the way of things it's better not to look "
Won't you help to sing another song of freedom.

I took some slight liberties with Bob's lyrics there but the meaning is the same.

It's a statue that should have been removed long long ago mate, we shouldn't ever forget the past happend but we can never truly put the past behind us while we celebrate the very worst of it.

Hi Wyred mate
I have for years totally believed in Martin Luther Kings words that
" in the future We will have to teach the children of the future what war hunger and racism used to be because war hunger and racism won't exist in the future "
I know it seems impossible to believe right now but 100 years ago who would have believed that a woman could be prime minister when women
couldn't even vote at the time or a black man could be president of America when black and white children couldn't attend the same school or play together.
We the human race are still evolving mentally and emotionally, unfortunately some are struggling to keep up and are going to need some encouragement to put aside their fears and (in the words of Barack Obama) " unclench their fists and hold out their hands "

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29 May 2020 10:40:52
Watching the programme with Prince William last night on mens mental health it struck me how we as men are far more compassionate and understanding to others than we are ourselves.
If someone opened up to us we'd never think of them as weak or weird we'd make time for them and listen and do all we could to reassure them that they had just hit a low point and everything would be ok, yet we struggle to be so kind and understanding when it comes to seeing ourselves.
If we could only learn to set the bar at exactly the same hight for ourselves as we do others things would be so much better so much quicker when things are difficult.

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13 May 2020 00:41:54
I have been struggling with anixety and depression for a long while bur never admitted it, and now it has cost me my relationship I understand how serious it is affecting my life. I am just curious if anybody has any advise and tips as this is centre about my own obsessions I can't let go of in my relationship which is why it isn't in a good place at the moment.

Any advise would be helpful, thanks in advance.

{Ed001's Note - the key to it is admitting your problems to yourself and wanting to be better. That is the first (and by far the most difficult) step to change. The next step is to identify what caused your anxiety and depression initially. Not what triggers it now, but what started it. If you can identify that and talk about it to someone, then you will go a long way towards improving things.

You can talk about what triggers it now and get some short-term relief, but that is just like having a headache and taking aspirin. It treats the symptoms but the headache will keep coming back until you figure out what is actually causing you to have the headache in the first place.

Good luck mate, I really hope you will be able to get a handle on it, they are horrible things to struggle with.}

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13 May 2020 20:32:52
Hi mate try and do some research on how the mind works so as to get some understanding of why we all feel and act the way We do sometimes, for me I think getting to know and understand how our ego feeds on our fears and insecurities is a huge eye opener.
Some people have an over inflated ego where they feel superior to others most of the time while other people have a heavily deflated ego where they feel inferior in many areas of their life, of course niether are usaully true.
All our minds feed us loads False thoughts about ourselves and others that most of us allow to spoil our life's to some degree, how many times in all our life's has our mind predicted the worst case scenario? Thousands if not millions of times for most of us and how many of those thousands or millions of predictions from our minds have ever happend? How many times have we all told ourselves in our head that we know what other people think of us when we get something wrong? But in reality we have no idea what other people are thinking but our mind will almost always tell us it's negativ, which it rarely everything is.
Once you understand more about how and why the mind works as it does then you gain so much freedom and independence from its automatic responses and thoughts.

A good site is
Think Less Grow Rich run by Richard Patterson, if you Google it and once the site pops up go on the home page you will find a few short articles that relate to anxiety and the monkey mind as they call it.
Hope it helps mate, it helped me loads, good luck.

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13 May 2020 21:08:07
Thank you so much ED and gunner means a lot to know i'm not alone, like you said I feel slightly better for admitting it and I have started talking to people. I will definately look into how the mind worka and have a look at that website.

Thanks once again.

{Ed001's Note - it really does help to talk mate.}

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13 May 2020 21:45:00
Your more than welcome mate and you are most definitely not alone mate, at any given time 1 in 4 of us are struggling in some way or another mentally.
Like Ed001 says talking to others is so important because if we don't talk to others we all only end up talking to ourselves (mentally) and keep getting the same old self defeating false information that caused our problems in the first place.
You'll be fine mate because again like Ed said you've already taken the biggest step there is, admitting your struggling in the first place.

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14 May 2020 12:46:01
I myself have had battles with the black eyed dog. The trouble with depression is how quickly it can seep into your mind uninvited and take hold with a vice like grip.
One of the key things I did to unshackle myself from this unwanted visitor was to take a good look around me of what good and positive things I have in my life, family, friends, work mates etc.
I have also found keeping busy with hobbies helps, I listen to as much music as humanly possible, all types, all genres and I am learning to play guitar, very badly I might add, but trying to master that instrument is very relaxing indeed.
RJCFC: if I may offer you some advise about your relationship, you need to bare your soul completely to your partner as no doubt you had been keeping this from them, which in itself has caused you more problems and allowed your depression to accelerate.
I wish you well with this and if you need to talk about anything feel free.
You are not alone, and you do not need to deal with this alone.
Good luck going forward, you have already taken the hardest step by admitting you had a problem, be at peace my friend.

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14 May 2020 14:13:29
According to scientific studies Gratitude has exactly the same effect on the brain as antidepressants Kenny mate so what your saying about looking at family and positives in your life are well supported methods of support.

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15 May 2020 09:23:43
Thanks kenny mate, all the support is helping a lot more now and as for my relationship, we have agreed to give each other space as much aa possible so sleeping away from each other and relaxing apart and then when we do get together it is more enjoyable so fingers crossws for that. The outlook with my friends and family is what I have recently started doing and it is helping a great deal, knowing I can always ring somebody at any time is a massive help.
Thanks once again all the advise and support is fantastic.

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15 May 2020 10:21:24
Rjcfc: your more than welcome mate. I am glad that you and your partner have reached this compromise.
The key is to not bottle anything up and keep the line of communication open to your loved ones.
When you start to feel blue, take stock of what you have around you, think of a memory that gives you a warm feeling, play your favourite song, or watch your favourite film or comedy, failing that I find a good long walk helps, find a routine that you can live with, but always remember, you are not alone and you don't have to deal with this alone.

gunner62: I hope you are well my friend, you have been a massive help to us all on this site.
Thank you for your invaluable support.

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15 May 2020 17:09:41
Sorry to hear that mate. Went through a similar thing myself about 5 years ago. Ended up back in my parents for a few months lying in my old bed surrounded by boxes thinking my life was over. I found the thing that helped me most was focusing on positive changes. I bought my own house and did my own thing with it, changed my job and got a new car. Now I'm not suggesting doing all that! But a sense of achievement and focusing on moving forward rather on dwelling on the past helped enormously.

It's also a cliche but exercise really does works wonders. I focused on getting in shape and eating healthily. The endorphins obviously work wonders and give you a boost but you also gain a confidence particularly as you notice your image changing. Really focus on yourself and what makes you happy.

Also don't forget you are likely to have some days worse than others and that's ok. Unfortunately there is no miracle cure but remember you've come this far and you can get through it. Talking about it is one of the best things to do and I'm happy to give my email address if you feel you ever want to get anything off your chest.

You will get better and comes through the other side stronger.

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15 May 2020 17:58:24
Cheers Kenny mate, I think the more we share our own experiences the easier it gets for all of us to share and help each other in any way we can.
I'm ok at the moment thank you mate I've had a few days where I've struggled a bit more again lately but I think we've all had a few of those days over the last couple of months.
Hope all is OK with you and yours mate?

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16 May 2020 13:28:48
gunner62: your welcome mate. I look forward to the day we can banter together, football wise.
I am taking it one day at a time, I have good days and bad but being able to share feelings and problems has been a massive help.
No one needs to be alone in this day and age.
Thank you for being there, it means a lot to me.

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10 Jun 2020 01:00:44
As a starting point, go your google machine and type in IAPT, and the area you live in. And look for self referral.
Andy’s man clubs are getting across the country, look for them in your local area.

A quick CBT tool, write down what you think has happened and what you are struggling with. Then try and think what you, would advise a friend to do in that situation? Try and be your own best friend.

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08 May 2020 10:19:20
I’ve just been reading about Kyle Walker and him breaking the lockdown rules again.

Now I appreciate that he has gone through a hard time for whatever reason, mainly due to his party during lockdown last month but coming out like ‘woe is me’ doesn’t sit right with me. Everyone is struggling in their own ways with the quarantine but they are trying to make it work.
But to act like, because of his actions, it’s ok to visit family because it got a bit tough sends out completely the wrong message.
If we all had that mindset there would be no lockdown.
He has put it down to mental health, and I completely appreciate it can impact anyone, I have been there. But, and I apologise wholeheartedly if I am wrong, but it feels like it’s thrown in there to protect himself and he needs to accept that it’s his actions that have caused his family pain.
Apologies if my mini rant isn't for these pages.

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09 May 2020 15:36:14
Couldn't agree more Wyred mate, we are all struggling but some people have a complely disproportionate sense of self importantance and self importantance that exonerates them from what they feel is right for everyone but themselves and those they care about.
Footballers film stars pop stars by nature of their industries can
very easily develop a highly inflated sense of ego like Emma Thompson I think it was who was happy to lecture others on climate issues but laughed at the very idea of her personally having to fly economy. I genuinely don't think they can see past themselves anymore and genuinely struggle to understand why others can't appreciate and understand their personal needs above the rest of the world's.
Kyle Walker like so many high profile celebrities wants to be seen as and talked about as a fantastic role model while at the same time be excused for living and doing what's only good for Kyle Walker.
Selective sense of conscience, personal responsibility and morality I think they call it, he could certainly do with getting some professional help but not for the reasons he think he needs it in my opinion.

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10 May 2020 08:59:05
Half of these aren’t even close to role models mate, to be caught having a party and then to say, you are invading my privacy, just shows they have no idea of what’s going on around them.
Funny story, if you don’t go to the party and break the lockdown you won’t be in the papers.
Don’t get me started on the climate fighters who preach but then go and do something else.
Climate is clearly a huge issue we have to deal with but if you are so passionate about it you need to stick by your words and not just say it as it’s the right thing to do.

Hope your keeping sane in lockdown gunner!

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10 May 2020 11:48:12
Definitely having some tough days where I'm struggling a bit mentally Wyred mate but thankfully I'm still managing to have more ok days so far.
No one likes hypocritical people who don't practice what they so love to preach on a regular basis to everyone else about how they personally think the world should be, Just look at the scientists who are advising the rest of the country how to stay safe then breaking the rules they themselves helped create and are having to step down?
The problem with putting yourself on a pedestal is having the self control to stay there.
Lock down is tough and I totally understand some people are more capable of handling it than others but the more the minority of people brake the restrictions the longer the majority will have to suffer.
When it's all over people will naturally look back at the hero's and villains, those who went above and beyond for others and of course those who put themselves before everyone and anyone else, the problem for Kyle is he wants to live one way but seems to have a real need to be seen as one of the good guys and feels hard done by if people judge him by his actions rather than his words.
Hope all is good with you and yours Wyred mate.

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26 Apr 2020 20:53:47
Only now noticed this page. Fantastic idea eds especially in this time. Hope everyone is keeping safe physically and mentally.

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27 Apr 2020 13:44:35
Hi 85 mate hope all is good with you.

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27 Apr 2020 15:34:32
Soldiering on gunner how about yourself?

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28 Apr 2020 18:09:06
I'm having good days and not so good days with lock down mate, like everyone else I want things to return to something near normal asap but totally understand that we have to do the right things now for as long as it takes in order to keep casualties to an absolute minimum.
I'd be gutted if we act too quickly and have to do this all again, that would be extremely difficult.

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02 May 2020 13:28:38
Amen mate just try to keep yourself occupied and I find a routine helps. Stay safe.

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22 Apr 2020 12:09:43
Yes ed that is the idea, I have a few courses lined up with two other people who have helped along the way also jumping onto the course and yes i'm going to try and be involved with MIND on some for of integration or idea with them for a forum.

Thank you kindly for your support and those on your site also.

{Ed001's Note - that's great mate, good luck with it!}

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22 Apr 2020 12:55:04
Good luck jkh mate, hope it all goes really well mate.

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22 Apr 2020 13:51:37
Thanks gents!

Stay safe in this crazy world and roll on the return of the football and pubs!

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22 Apr 2020 11:14:05
Morning Ed1, not sure if my previous landed, after discussions with MIND I've decided to close themindofmen and develop things with them directly, the main thought behind that is they have the resources and professional that I dont. So i'm glad my idea has hit home and I hope to implement it or similar via the MIND platform.

Anyway thank you all for the support to date and I will keep you posted on when things develop via MIND.

Ed1 if you could please close the thread showing the site as it will be closed today.

Thanks Gunner and SY watch this space!

{Ed001's Note - Deleted by Ed033 now, I do think it is a good idea to hand it over to those who are trained to deal with it. Are you going to get involved with MIND and get some training yourself?}

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13 Apr 2020 21:50:56
Thanks mate take care.

{Ed001's Note - very welcome mate, good luck with it.}

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14 Apr 2020 08:40:37
That's brilliant jkh mate, well done you.

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14 Apr 2020 09:48:05
Thanks gunner, its basic for now but the premise is there and the hope is I can grow a collection of members to bring people together and help each other. The more people we have together the more support we can offer people. As Ed1 said if I/ we as a collective can help just one person then its a success.

{Ed001's Note - it has given you a purpose, so that has helped you during this quarantine. So it is already a success imo.}

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14 Apr 2020 11:04:53
Thanks Ed, its already gaining a bit of a discussion on some platforms so hopefully people will buy into the idea.

Appreciate your support and the publish of the site.

{Ed001's Note - that's great mate, I really hope it helps as many people as possible.}

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14 Apr 2020 11:15:38
From little acorns grow jkh mate, you have planted the seed with a compassionate heart and that's an excellent thing to do mate.
I'm sure people will contribute because I think it's the most natural thing in the world for anyone who has struggled themselves and recovered to want to help others get back on track too.

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14 Apr 2020 12:19:31
Thank Gunner hope to see you over there as you have a good insight to help others!

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14 Apr 2020 13:27:55
I will very gladly contribute in anyway I can jkh mate,

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14 Apr 2020 14:53:07
Great news gunner, when you get a chance jump over and create a profile then you are in and can join the forum!

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14 Apr 2020 17:36:03
Hi jkh couple of quick questions on signing up and creating a profile mate.
Other than this site I don't use any social media face book twitter ect so need to use my email address which isn't a problem but would my email address be publicly visible?
I know most people wouldn't dream of abusing the information but unfortunately there are few out there who unfortunately are not so respectful.
Sorry if I'm being thick but there is no hiding the fact I'm pretty much a technology dinosaur.

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15 Apr 2020 09:14:12
Hi Gunner from what I can tell/ see your email is hidden and is not in the public eye, it is on the back end of the site which I can see as an admin of the site but not for general use that I have noted. If you go to the members screen you can go in and out of the different profiles for people who have already signed up and you should be able to see anything other than the names the have chosen to display on their profiles. The auto responses from the website will also go direct to the email you used to sign up but again not visual.

Im not 100% as its still very much being developed on the go but if you do note an issue do let me know and ill do what I can to resolve. I agree most wouldn't want to display their details.

Hope that helps.

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15 Apr 2020 10:22:22
Yes Jkh mate that's brilliant:-)
Thank you.

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15 Apr 2020 12:14:51
No problem bud and thanks for being part of the journey from the start!

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15 Apr 2020 13:50:47
Ed1 are you coming over? more than welcome to join the community bud your input is welcomed.

How is the virus where you are btw?

{Ed001's Note - if I get time mate I certainly well.

It's fine here, they are disinfecting everything, the streets etc, on an almost daily basis. Very few deaths, so hopefully it will stay that way.}

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17 Apr 2020 14:09:05
Thats good to hear bud, stay safe.

{Ed001's Note - cheers mate. I hope all is well in your neck of the woods?}

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17 Apr 2020 23:41:07
It is what it is we have to accept the world we are in and do what is needed in this time for the greater good long term. I like to think of the positives we can take from this like what is really important in life. Gives us a good chance to take stock.

{Ed001's Note - very true and the best way to deal with it is look for the positives.}

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21 Apr 2020 20:21:26
Busier than our rumour / banter page! Hopefully that’s not causing anyone stress.

Just signed up to the above — once you create a user name with email, edit the name In profile.

Have a great evening everyone - first post made on the mind men done 👊.

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21 Apr 2020 20:27:46
Welcome on board SY4 thank you for joining!

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21 Apr 2020 20:32:54
Ps I've added a new step to the how to join page on the back of your feedback to incorporate a process on how to amend your username prior to posting on the forums.

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12 Apr 2020 16:21:50
Hi everyone,

This sites a great idea and it's important we we all look after ourselves right now.

I thought it might be useful if we post tips of things helping us cope in these strange days.

Personally I've found getting back into gaming has been great. Given I tend to game with friends too it gives us a reason to get on the headset and talk to each other while gaming. Honestly it feels like I'm much more in touch with friends compared to when we were allowed outside.

Hope you're all having nice weekend wherever you are.


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13 Apr 2020 12:01:39
Hi Taurus mate and a nice tip that mate.
I think we are all beginning to have a new found appreciation of what really is and isn't important to us mate.
For me personally I'm not thinking about the next big holiday or any material ambitions for when things get better but more about seeing family again and making more of an effort to see mates I text or talk to one the phone occasionally but who I've not made much effort to actually see for ages.
I've also been thinking a lot about a career change and doing something I actually enjoy doing Monday to Friday rather than accepting something I don't really enjoy doing simply because it pays a bit more money.

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13 Apr 2020 21:20:46
That sounds very progressive gunner62. These times show how lucky we are in the world we live. I too am feeling once this is over it’s time to make up lost time with family and friends.

It’s important to enjoy what you do mate. We live in good times where we can quit our job (albeit I understand not everyone can do this due to finances) and go pursue other ventures. It’s hard to know what’s the dream job or something you might like until you try it out. I think you should do it mate. If you aren’t struggling to put food on the table then a career change is worth it if it’ll make you more happy.

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10 Apr 2020 09:10:56
Morning Ed1/ all, i'm getting close to being able to release something could I perhaps run things by you?

{Ed001's Note - of course mate, feel free.}

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10 Apr 2020 09:59:49
great what is the best way to send the info just in here?

{Ed033's Note - Can you submit it via a posting form on here?

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10 Apr 2020 17:10:17
Okies thanks will do, have a couple of issues to iron out first should hopefully not take too long but the bank holiday may take things a bit longer.

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30 Mar 2020 13:31:25
Great idea and credit to all whom have had an input into creating it. I like many have and do suffer with mental health problems and have close friends whom suffer the same. For a long time I've toyed with the idea of setting up a charity for mens mental health to bring people together who can talk and support in an open or closed environment. I take my hat off to you all for placing a stone down in the path to beat he stigma that is attached to something that cripples many.

{Ed001's Note - have you spoken to people like MIND? Before setting up one, you might one to speak to one that is already there to see if they can either help or they have those facilities already available and you could help with theirs.}

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31 Mar 2020 08:15:05
No I haven't actually bud I will do now though, hope you and the family are well.

Take care.

{Ed001's Note - good luck mate, whichever way you choose to go. If you can help even one person that would be brilliant. If everyone helped one person in their life, it would make a huge difference to the world.

As for MIND, they are a great charity, well worth speaking to.}

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31 Mar 2020 09:39:57
Thats the idea to share from an personal perspective and hopefully help build processes to get people by.

By far the hardest fight anyone ever undertakes and not one they choose.

I will contact MIND and have a chat and try to develop an idea or maybe help them. Thanks for the info bud.

{Ed001's Note - good luck mate!}

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31 Mar 2020 09:55:27
Hi jkh mate sorry to hear you and your friends are struggling too mate, as Ed001 says there is help out there and I'm sure MIND would help you set up a local group if one doesn't already exist I'm sure
For me understanding what is happening to you and what maintains it is a huge step to getting better,
I was looking at the BBC news online yesterday reading what was happening in the world and right at the bottom of the page was a an article asking Do We Really Have Free Will?
There are several very short videos on there all related to how our mind works and some of it is quite interesting.
Of course we have free will, we breathe without needing to think about it but if we choose to we can hold our breath or breathe faster or slower than normal but most of the time we are happy to let our subconscious do the job it's designed to do for us.
We have the brilliant abilty to sometimes stop ourselves saying or doing something we might regret as we have a crucial split second gap between thought and action in which we realise it's maybe not the right thing to say or do at that time, unfortunately there is no split second safety catch between thought and thought or feeling and feelings we get them without the chance to think first so we end up taking our thoughts and feeling personally because we think we are producing them because we believe we and our minds are one and the same thing when in reality we are no more our minds than we are our lungs liver or heart, they are ours but they are not us. I think knowing and really understanding and accepting this is so liberating and for me finally put on the path out of the maze I'd been stuck in for such a long time.

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31 Mar 2020 10:24:45
Brilliant comment Ed001 mate, if we all helped just one person!

{Ed001's Note - it always annoys me when people say there is nothing they can do and it would make no difference! You can help one person and it will make the world of difference to them. Hopefully they will also help one person and so on. The world only needs a tiny amount of change to make a difference.}

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31 Mar 2020 11:02:18
Brilliant philosophy Ed001 mate so true, the biggest gift we can ever give anyone is our time and a chance to share how they are feeling.
It can be so difficult to say to someone " I'm not ok " but if someone takes the time to ask "are you OK" with genuine compassion it can create a real opportunity for someone to open up which is sometimes all thars needed.
Homeless people get so lonely and quite often would prefer our company to our money.

{Ed001's Note - listening to people is a skill that seems to be disappearing. Everyone is glued to their phones now. I walked along the creek here a few weeks back and must have passed 60 people and not one of them even looked up from their phone. No wonder people are so lonely, they don't actually talk to each other, just text.}

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31 Mar 2020 11:25:34
I'm hopeful that once the current situation is finally over we might have all learned that technology really is a poor substitute for genuine human interaction, sometimes we have to lose something before we realise just how important it was to us in the first place.

{Ed001's Note - because I spend so much time working looking at a screen, every moment I can get away from it I treasure. It is so nice to actually talk to people rather than type at people!}

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31 Mar 2020 11:46:05
It's a bit like choosing to order online rather than be bothered to go shopping for what you need, in 3 months time I think people will be so thankful to be able to go out and
physically shop and interact again.
Who knows what good might come from adversity.

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01 Apr 2020 00:24:45
Great post and reply’s.
Andy’s man club is also invaluable, there’s probably one near the OP. It’s a great space to talk, and share experience.
If not think about contacting them and setting a group up.

There should be a IAPT service that can offer, therapies like CBT or counselling.

It’s a magnificent resource this EDs. Good work.

{Ed001's Note - thanks mate though it was really down to g62.}

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01 Apr 2020 15:22:17
Thanks G62 I personally have found a way to get through the dark times and limit them where best. As a result of that and experience in the area my thought was simply to reach out to those in a bad place. I've done so with some close friends already and continue to support them as often as I can and always when needed. I then stretched that out to people in my work who also had the issues so I gave an insight and hopefully a way through which seems to have assisted. That is kind of the path I've walked and thought ok if that small chat or a little guidance here and there could help someone even a little then perhaps I've done something worthwhile albeit small.

So yes appreciate the posts from all and from the site as a whole for enabling another place for people to talk as it can be easier to for people to talk online behind a username than in person. I spoken to a few resources recently and the people already doing things are great but there is clearly space for more support on our shores and undoubtedly across the globe.

An online forum is something I will also look to unless this page is to stay open, I wouldn't want to step on any toes, but a place for men to simply login under a non-descript username and talk to others with similar issues and experience could go along way I think.

I will lean on some of the IT contacts I have around me that have built some of my corporate webpages but any info on how easy or hard it would be to publish a forum site would would helpful if anyone has knowledge. Also if anyone wants to help grow the idea again more than happy.

From small acorns we can grow mighty oaks.

Peace and thanks!

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01 Apr 2020 18:00:07
Hi jkh mate that's brilliant that you are feeling much better mate I an so pleased for you. I think when you start to feel much better yourself over a sustained period it's the most natural thing in the world to want to pass on that wonderful gift of peace of mind to others who are not currently able to find it and what you are doing with friends and work mates is a brilliant thing to do mate.
We can all only really share our own stories experiences and what finally worked for us mate and I don't think there can possibly be too much help out there, for me personally actually telling another human being namely my Doctor took me from the 40% recovery I'd achieved from some really good websites over 5 years or more to 60% in an instant just by actually saying to another human being " I'm struggling a bit mentally " and set me finally on the right tracks.
When we aren't strong enough to speak on personal basis about how we feel being able to share anonymously or just reading that you are not alone and many many other people feel just the same way or even similar to you is so comforting.
I think keep up what you are doing jkh mate and expand in every way you feel you happy to because although it's a cliche replacing the I in Illness with WE really does bring WElness.

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05 Apr 2020 03:04:59
Thats so true Ed01. During this lockdown, whenever my wife order food online, she will always give an extra buck or even rounded up the payment and tell the riders to keep them. I asked her, are those tips? She said she isn't think about them as tips, but she is sure it will help them at least a bit to pump petrol in their bikes, especially during this hard times. I'm so proud of her.

Yes you don't have to help tens or hundreds of people. And you also don't have to spend hundreds or thousands to help people. And definitely you don't have to be rich to help people. As long as you being honest and with great intentions.

God bless you all. Stay safe always.

{Ed001's Note - that's the point, it only takes a little bit to make a difference. If everyone tips the delivery guy, then he makes a decent living, instead of scraping by. Even if that tip is very small, it does make a difference.}

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25 Mar 2020 10:39:54
While looking for answers to my own issues on the Internet a name I kept seeing mentioned was Ekhart Tolle but for years I stayed away from his articles and YouTube clips because the way people were putting on such a high pedestal using phrases like " Spiritual teacher " and being " Enlightened " gave the impression of him being some kind of cult leader and it put me right off looking into him as I knew I was vulnerable and the last thing I needed was to have some cult leader messing with and getting into my already confused and fearful mind.
Since I've found myself with a lot of free time since March started and I was in a much better place mentally I decided to check out this Ekhart Tolle bloke and I'm really pleased I did as I couldn't have been more wrong about him if I'd tried :-)
There are some really short clips of 3 to 5 minutes as well as much longer ones available on YouTube of him if anyone's interested in taking a look at him.
He is basically a really nice human being who came through pretty difficult mental illness and decided to learn more about how the mind does what it does and share it with other people, he's also really funny at times too.
If you do check him out try to watch the bit how he rented out a room in his house in Glastonbury :-) really funny story while at the same time very eye opening to how we all get caught up with our thoughts.
Prior to watching him I though the Ego was all about being big headed but it turns out that's not the case at all and our Ego plays a huge role in our mental health struggles, I've found it really interesting as well as very helpful and hope if anyone checks it out they will too.

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27 Mar 2020 23:55:58
I will have a look over the weekend mate not something I have looked in to but I have been very consumed in my own head to loom or even knowing where to look thank you mate.

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28 Mar 2020 11:39:10
Hi Berg mate hope you find something that helps in some way in them mate.

We've come a long way in understanding how our bodies work and how to maintain them better but most of us know next to nothing about how our minds work and why we struggle.
We take our thoughts and feelings personal because we think we are producing them when in fact 99.9% of out thoughts are our minds working on auto pilot merely reproducing what got our attention yesterday and the day before again today much like predictive text does, understanding and accepting this helped me so much and helped me break the unhappy and unhealthy thinking trap I'd fallen into.
I very much appreciate like our bodies not all minds suffer with the same things at the same time in the same way but the very basic raw principles are similar, like a GP with the body there are people out there who have good understanding of the mind who can help us all help ourselves, very thankfully.

I wish you so much well Berg mate I truly do and hope like everyone everywhere who is struggling right now you find peace with mind very very soon mate. God bless you mate.

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25 Mar 2020 08:05:09
In my early 20’s I had a lot of anxiety and used to get in a right state about minor things.

Some of you know I lost my job pre Christmas, not the end of the world as it’s happened a few times I recent years. But I have a mortgage to pay and 2 kids to get through Uni. 2 weeks ago I had an interview and it went really well. Last Monday I had a final interview with the Board and I nailed it, I knew I’d done a great job. But, on Wednesday I got the call, ‘really sorry, due to the virus we are freezing all recruitment, we have already seen business start to drop’. So here I am with no job, and a mortgage to pay, and most companies have frozen all their recruitment.

But here’s the thing, there are always people worse off, many more will be losing their jobs, their livelihoods, or their houses. I did a great interview, I did my best and it was good enough, who’d have thought a bloody virus would do this? This will have a huge impact on people’s mental health.

If I can’t get the right job, I’ll get any job, and I’ll be brilliant at it. If I can’t afford the roof over my head, I’ll get a smaller roof. I have a lovely wife and 2 great kids, anything else in a bonus.

I’m not sure when my thinking changed, but you have to play each card as it is dealt. Focusing on the future and being positive is the only way. It’s working for me.

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25 Mar 2020 09:44:35
Brilliant mind set AJH mate and it will all work out ok mate. the current situation will come to an end and jobs will become available again.
In time we will all look back at 2020 and see how it brought some positives along with all the obvious negatives.

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25 Mar 2020 12:29:03
It’s pretty strange gunner, at a time when I should be feeling pretty anxious and stressed I’m not. I’m not sure what changed or why, over the years the symptoms relented slightly but about 5 years ago, bang, just stopped, pretty much overnight, I have no idea why.

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25 Mar 2020 14:31:44
That's excellent to hear AJH mate and gives everyone who's caught bang in the middle of it now real hope.
There is some real negative false information from some people on some websites about how you can never be totally free from anxiety ocd depression etc but although it made my heart sink when I first read it even back then I still knew in my heart that couldn't be true and evey successes story gives real hope to those who aren't quite there yet themselves mate.
The place your in right now mentally is fantastic and puts you in an excellent position to not only take control of everything that is controllable but to also accept what is beyond anyone's control right now and adjust accordingly.
Although I'm sorry to hear about your job on the whole i'm happy for you AJH mate and certainly sounds like the current situation is merely a delay rather than a derailment of your future succes mate :-) .

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27 Mar 2020 23:53:39
AJH stay strong buddy look into what help is Available mortgage payment breaks (you are entitled to it if it helps take it) take the time to find a passion and chase it I have read a few post you have put on the liverpool pages always come across really well and you seem like a really top guy I'm sure something will show itself for you soon hopefully an even better opportunity comes along.

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24 Mar 2020 18:50:10
This is a fabulous idea.

Well done and thank you.

{Ed001's Note - it was g62's idea, all credit has to go to him.}

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24 Mar 2020 21:20:55
It's been a team effort Ed001 mate, I asked the question and you and Ed033 made it happen and here we all are all sharing with and learning from and supporting each other.
I think it's brilliant that we are opening up and hopefully more people who want to talk but are not sure how will find the strength to Just say hi and get involved at the pace they feel comfortable with on a day to day basis.

{Ed001's Note - all I did was pass a message on to be fair!}

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24 Mar 2020 22:50:23
But to be even fairer than fair mate :-) You could have quite easily have not passed the message on at all, plus not only that you have joined in and taken part which I'm sure has most definitely helped the page take off and others get involved.
Each and everyone of us that contributes make it easier for others to do the same, safety and normality in numbers.

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23 Mar 2020 21:32:33
*through each day as hard as it is.

{Ed001's Note - I have to say, Claire House are brilliant. I am so glad they were there to help you. I remember when they were raising the funds and my uncle did a non-stop joke telling world record for it. He broke the record, but one night Claire's dad was one of the adjudicators and I spent a long time just chatting with him. Such a nice guy and I am so glad he could achieve so much in her memory.

How about you now? Are you doing any better? It is the hardest thing in the world to cope with losing a child.}

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23 Mar 2020 23:59:13
Sorry to read about your loss - my heart and thoughts are with you.

Can’t imagine what you went through - you sound like a strong person. Hope you are ok and moving in the right direction.

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23 Mar 2020 22:34:01
That's amazing ed it is a special place I'm not really any better but I get through 1 day at a time it's really strange happy moments become sad like when we won the champions league last year I was happy for us but sobbing that my boy wasn't sat next to me it's the happiest of times that are the saddest how is everything your end mate.

{Ed001's Note - that is what you need to do though mate. You need to cry and let it out or it builds up.}

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24 Mar 2020 08:49:57
Thats amazing ed claire house is an amazing place they organise so much for us bereaved parents they have parent plus separate mum and dad group sessions a dads football session every month and constantly checking we are ok and if we needs anything

Thanks sy I'm not that strong just have people who depend on me hopefully someone reading this sees a bit of light in thier life I always hid the real dark thoughts I had which made things worse I feared if I spoke about what is really going on in my head I would be wrapped up and thrown into a padded room but it's not the case when I finally opened up to my councillors it was like getting your head out of water and taking a massive much needed breath now they joke with me about the "men in white coats" if we speak about dark thoughts talking is always better no matter how bad it is.

{Ed001's Note - I am really glad you linked up with them. They are brilliant and he was such a nice guy it broke my heart listening to him talk about his loss. I was still only a teenager myself at the time and it did really affect me hearing his story and made me rethink a lot of my life. The dad just wanted to help others as he did not have any help and I have a lot of admiration for him for what he has done.}

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24 Mar 2020 09:21:48
Hi Berg I'm so sorry to hear about your terrible loss, every parents worse nightmare bless you.
Certainly puts everything else into perspective.
My parents lost my sister quite a few years before I was born and although they never fully recovered from life's cruellest blow they did in time go on to find way to live life fully again, I remember my mum crying about my sister at times throughout my life but I also remember lots of happiness fun laughter as well as ups and downs like every other family.
My mum always told me about my dad never crying but simply looking after her and I can't ever remember my dad ever talking about my sister to anyone although me my mum and two other sisters quite often did.
It was only after my dad passed himself that I realised how he must have kept all his emotions inside and carried them alone which makes me feel so much for him and what he must have felt but kept hidden from everyone but himself, talking is most definitely the answer and fortunately we live in a much more emotionally evolved society today where we all accept that men most definitely do cry because crying is a human coping mechanism that serves a vital role in our Wellbeing.
God bless Berg mate and please keep talking because one of the truest things I've ever read is
If you replace the I in illness with WE you get wellness.
never a truer word said.

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24 Mar 2020 09:23:49
Definitely mate there is a lot of advertising of:
"If you need help seek help" with clare house the help is there always but outside of clare house in the real world help is only available if you have money to pay for it.

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24 Mar 2020 10:52:36
That unfortunately is true mate but as we are evolving we are coming to realise that mental health is every bit as important as physical health and in fact the two go hand in hand.
Once the penny finally drops for everyone that for every £1 we spend on helping with mental health in the early stages we save £100s if not £1000s on trying to fix both the mental and physical health problems that come from letting people struggle to long in the first place.
There is a very long way to go still but we are at least beginning to see things more clearly.
I saw on TV where a GP was offering group sessions where they could see 12 patients at a time after the initial one to one appointments and it was working really well with people gaining so much strength and confidence from each other and realising they were just like everyone else and just how ok it is to not always be ok.

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24 Mar 2020 13:05:51
Thanks gunner your dad must of been an amazing tough man (we call it wearing a mask in therapy what people see on the outside is not what's on the inside men perfect this which is necessary as people often distance themselves if you don't because you bring them down) I would of not been able to carry the burden all alone I have been so lucky in the support claire house have given me don't get me wrong I still hold a lot in and I go off by myself when I do need to let it all out because they can't cope thinking I am coping if they see me break it will add the the worry and anxiety they suffer with I really came out my shell since losing logan when I joined group therapys and they spoke about things I had been hiding which gave me the confidence to speak I only write these things to make awareness and to give someone else the confidence to talk instead of bottling g every thing up they say stress is like a dripping tap it not a problem untill the sink is blocked.

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24 Mar 2020 14:20:13
Hi Berg mate, I often wonder what my dad went through inside as you say behind his mask bless him, I think back in the day men were just expected to sort themselves out but maybe my dad did open up to my nan or grandad away from the rest of the world, I hope so. My reason for mentioning my mum and dad was to say how life did somehow come back together in many ways for them.
I think it's brilliant that you are sharing and by doing so you are definitely bring strength to others to maybe do the same.
I hope the more we all share the more anyone else who is struggling for any reason will find the strength to Join in should they want to either lighten their own mental rucksack or share tips that helped them through past struggles that might also help others now.
I think you are amazingly strong just for putting one foot in front of the other let alone all the other things you are achieving piece by piece Berg mate.

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25 Mar 2020 22:28:27
Thanks gunner stay safe mate.

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23 Mar 2020 21:32:15
Hit send by accident *
While in hospital on life support we were approached by organ donation team (an amazing guy called andrew) my boy gave his heart and has saved another childs life we don't know who or where buy we know they are alive thanks to my son since this happened obviously my mental health plummets and I become high risk to myself nhs (who discharge kids same day to save money) sent me out a survey to asses me I lied even me sugar coating the questions I came back high risk and was told a therapist would be Available in 6-12 months now after my son passed we got in touch with claire house who gave us a place to rest our son untill his funeral also we could spend all day with him and they looked after us making sure we ate and drank (really things like eating and drinking are something you completely forget about) my wife got in touch with the councillors and they got me in the next day to asses me it took months of me being guarded to finally open up to them now the pain will never leave me and really I am counting the days till I get to leave and be with my son but untill that happens naturally I have to get thr.

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