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20 Mar 2020 14:56:36
Not a lot of action on this site.


1.) 20 Mar 2020 14:59:15
Wait until G62 gets on here.


2.) 20 Mar 2020 16:55:45
Hi Ed033 I'm here :-) and will be posting on Mental health a little later, something I wouldn't have felt comfortable doing a few months back but I've since realised how much difference it makes to talk to someone about what's troubling you rather than trying to sort yourself out in your own mind continuously, not a recipe for a happy mind :-)

{Ed033's Note - ok great, thanks. looking forward to it.


3.) 20 Mar 2020 19:04:38
How longs this site been knocking around for? Hope it provides a space for people to talk.

And g62 not sure there is a medicine for supporting the gunners!

In all seriousness, hope your ok mate!

{Ed033's Note - This site was reopened today


4.) 20 Mar 2020 20:46:36
Hi Wyred mate, I'm genuinely doing much better these days thank you mate rather than trying hide the fact I wasn't ok from everyone but myself.
A few years back I became aware of my what they call in the trade apparently as " Monkey mind " which is always producing uhappy untrue thoughts for you to think about and then judging you for having them in the first place, weird I know :-)

Very very confusing and in the early days I couldn't understand why my own mind had suddenly got it in for me, really scary stuff but how do you tell someone else about it without them thinking your insane?
I suffered for a few years trying to find answers and a solution on the Internet and some bits definitely did help for a while but were really more of a sticky plaster than a solution.

Towards the end of last year I had a health scare (which thank God was all fine) that left me no choice but to go to the doctors and when I got there the doctors was really kind and compassionate and before I knew it I was actually saying to another human being " I'm struggling mentally " she was absolutely brilliant and assured me that there was nothing wrong that wasn't very easily fixed, the relieve of actually telling someone else gave me an immediate feeling that I really was going to be ok and could find my way back to being myself 100% again and I've been making real lasting progress ever since.

It's so important to talk rather than suffer alone it really is and if anyone is struggling I hope they might use this page to share because IT REALLY IS OK TO NOT BE OK SOMETIMES, 1 in 4 people in the UK alone are struggling at any given time and sharing really is the answer honestly it is.


5.) 21 Mar 2020 20:15:37
Good to hear it 62 - us men are terrible at talking, taking health action early and generally ignoring advice or instruction. At work we are doing a lot more on mental well-being, healthy lifestyle as well as financial well being. Target certainly feels like men of all ages& it’s amazing the difference between men and women in different areas. We aim for equality but there are so many inherent differences that probably means equality has its own barometer in different areas. The more aware people are of these differences the more we can have a happy diverse world. Hope you sharing helps someone else realise it’s good to talk. Glad your good and glad you’re talking about it. Your a hero to someone out there.


6.) 22 Mar 2020 01:17:58
The above are very inspirational and refreshing words.

A huge benefit is that mental health awareness is becoming evermore accepted in today's society.

Anxiety, depression and similar ailments are all part of the human psyche, and effects all of us in different ways, and different levels - whether it be permanent, sporadic or short-term, long-term spells.

I think the initial step for those of us who suffer from such ailments is to know that we are not alone in how we feel, or what our brain says. And that talking, writing or expressing it in different ways does help - not only you but even the recipient.


7.) 22 Mar 2020 10:24:46
Thanks SY mate, yes us men are the worst for not talking about the things that trouble us and unfortunately what doesn't come out goes in and because our mind is only concerned with our survival it will not let you ignore what it perceives as a threat to survival.
As someone once said " the mind is both the policeman and the theif " so you can't out smart it and thinking about how to stop thinking just makes the problem bigger and bigger, but of course we want it to stop so we can't help but think of how to we can make that happen, it's a vicious circle once your in it.
The biggest game changer for me was when I found a site called " THINKLESS GROW RICH " written by a man who tried everything to get his mind to leave him alone including joining a monastery and becoming a monk for 7 years, drastic I know but when you've exhausted everything else I guess you'll try anything.
He helped me through his articles finally understand that we don't produce 99% of our thoughts they come from our mind working on auto pilot as with when we drive our cars without consciously thinking about.
Not just knowing but truly accepting and understanding you are not your thoughts really really is a massive step to freedom it really is.
we don't get to choose what thoughts pop into our minds 99% of it is the mind on auto pilot working on memory prediction and most importantly habit, but the really good news is nothing on the planet can make us think about what we choose not to, thoughts are not an option but thinking really is :-) once I actually understood the difference between thoughts and thinking it really was the beginning of my recovery and each and every day got a little easier, yes I had but it was a blip nothing like the one step forward two back as over the past few years.

Hi NPG92 mate, thanks for posting and joining our new group therapy :-) You are spot on with everything you say mate, we all each and everyone of us without exemption have a monkey mind that causes us to worry and over think things at times, it's all natural behaviour for everyone but unfortunately some of us get sucked in and it becomes a habit that can become extremely addictive without realising it and before we know it we are hooked.
There really is good help out there but as with everything on the Internet you've got to be little careful about who's advice you listen too,
I am very happy to share what has helped me with everyone because I now know there is absolutely nothing to be embarrassed about and if I had talked and shared much earlier I wouldn't have struggled so much for so long and life really can get back to normal again and in some ways even better than before because I've gained a whole new appreciation of what really matters and how lucky I am and have always been even when things seemed to be really tough.

I hope everyone will keep posting, now we've got the ball rolling :-)

{Ed001's Note - interesting stuff g62. I don't believe there is anyone who hasn't struggled at some point with their mental health. In the past people just ignored it and carried on, but those problems built up and were released in the wrong ways. It is only when you admit a problem that you can truly deal with it.}


8.) 22 Mar 2020 11:35:13
100% agree Ed001 mate, we all struggle at various points in our life and fortunately most the time we get through it quite quickly and without hitting rock bottom even though it feels like rock bottom at the time no matter what it is.
Years ago if you asked someone " are you OK " they would sometimes answer " yeah I'm just a bit depressed today " but of course what they meant was they were feeling a bit low that day, it's only through public awareness we've all come to understand what depression really is and what a terrible effect it can have on some poor people who get it really bad and unfortunately ocd isn't all about tidings up, if only it was :-) .
Understanding how our minds work and why they behave in the way they do sometimes really is liberating and helps you understand " I'm not mad, I'm just struggling a bit at this time "
Thank you for restarting this page mate I think together we can all learn from and help each other, as you say mate none of us are immune and equally none of us are a beyond recovering 100%, if a man who becomes a monk for 7 years in his desperation to escape his troubled mind can recover there is definitely hope for us all :-)

{Ed001's Note - I will just be glad if it helps someone. Too much talk of people being 'snowflakes' if they are not well in the UK, rather than trying to help them. It is not a good attitude as you don't know what else they have gone through in their life which has made them so.}


9.) 22 Mar 2020 12:04:55
Think it was perceived as a weakness. “Man up’, “if you can’t handle the hear. ” etc

We actually need to learn to talk about rubbish as a man because saying - yes I’ve had a good day and now what’s for tea actually tells your partner or family to not ask questions. So then you speaking about something makes it a bigger deal. Women find it easier to talk about rubbish in general. Speak to friends for an hour before they go out with them. It’s natural skill. We should learn from that so big things are easier.

I let things blow up and need to get better - good thing is, more people genuinely ask if you are ok as behaviour changed.

That snowflake comment is interesting as I’ve used it and now feel bad.

I moan about boxes we put people into but may be that helps.

Talking about stuff allows you to sleep and I now know how important sleep is. My issue was working to hard and not sleeping. Trying to balance better to help me spend more time with family and my mental state.

Thanks guys and girls 🤗.


10.) 22 Mar 2020 12:13:29
Absolutely Ed001 mate, if together we help Just one person find the strength to say " I'm not ok at the moment " and get their mental peace back then it will be a brilliant achievement by us all :-)

" the mind makes a fantastic servant but a terrible master "
Just one of 100s if not 1000s of little gems I picked while trying to find answers to my own struggles :-) .

{Ed001's Note - exactly mate. And it does take a lot of strength to admit to a problem, whatever the problem is. That is why people hide behind pills or alcohol or whatever other ways they can find to pretend everything is fine.}


11.) 22 Mar 2020 14:12:44
100% Ed001 mate, pills do help people cope but they don't cure the problem, practical medicine has saved countless life's by helping people cope but education and helping people understand what how why their mind behaves as it does where the cure lays.
Scientists have discovered that gratitude lights up the same area of the brain as antidepressants and releases the happy hormones dopamine and serotonin and in studies people who expressed what they were grateful for got a free hit of the good stuff :-) . No one quite understands exactly how it works yet but even those who weren't actually feeling particularly grateful at the time but merely said the words got a hit all the same.
People who keep a gratitude journal each day where each evening they have to write down 5 things that happend that day report a huge difference in happiness levels simply because they spend all day noticing all the good things in order to pick their best 5 each day. Interesting stuff that will surely help us prevent rather than cure in the years to come.

Your so right SY what we don't deal but try to hide from becomes bigger the more you run from it, if we are lucky sometimes issues in the outside world resolve themselves and our problems disappear by themselves but we don't always get lucky and we have to actually deal with them ourselves.
The strange thing is we know from experience that things are very very seldom if ever as bad as our fearful imagination tells us they are yet we listen to our fearful minds so much :-)
If our minds were a person who each and every day made countless feaful predictions that never ever came true how long would we take notice of them? Yet our minds been doing it to us for years and we still fool for its lies over and over again, weird isn't it ;-)

{Ed001's Note - interesting stuff that g62. It makes sense too, as those that are happy with what they have tend to be the most grateful people for any little thing.}


12.) 22 Mar 2020 16:10:45
It is interesting Stuff Ed001 mate a bit like placebos, we know they work but we are not yet sure why or how.
We all know people and families who don't have a lot of money or material things but are so happy and enjoy everything they have and each other to the full and equally people who are loaded with material wealth but desperately unhappy.
Sometimes life's knocks remind us of what really does matter to us and what feels like the end of the world sometimes can later with the benefit of time and hindsight make us realise if that hadn't happened then I wouldn't have been where I am now.
The thing for us all to realise is how important it is to share not only our good times but our also our not so good times with each other.

{Ed001's Note - and if anyone on here is wondering how they can share the not so good times with each other, they can just pop to the Arsenal site.....}


13.) 22 Mar 2020 16:38:37
Oh yes we are full of it mate :-)
But suddenly the Xhaka and Mustafi weakness don't seen to be that important to anyone right now mate, it will be a very happy day when they are once again dominate everyone's concerns and it's all wrvc got to worry about :-) .
16 seasons without a title challenge? I think most people would snatch your hand off to be guaranteed to see another 20 just like the last 16 right now mate :-)

{Ed001's Note - fair point.}


 

 

 

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20 Mar 2020 14:59:15
Wait until G62 gets on here.


 

 

 

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